Another Journey Begins...

Today, our son Jack turned 18 months old. This milestone has no particular significance greater than the 17- or 19-month marks, per se, but as new(ish) parents, it’s another occasion to look back at how much life — his and ours — has changed in such a short amount of time.

Though we never experienced fertility issues ourselves, as adoptive parents, we’re sensitive to the fact family planning is all about choices and chance. You control what you can, however little that may be. 

We can vividly recall the moments leading up to when Jack came into our lives, but it’s easy to overlook all of the choices that were made years in advance to set his arrival in motion.

What if Elizabeth hadn’t chosen at a young age that she would someday become a parent through adoption? What if she hadn’t shared her adoption wishes shortly after we began dating in college? What if we had started our first adoption process sooner — or later? What if we hadn’t chosen the agency that we did? What if we had signed up for an earlier or later info session, thus affecting when we were able to enter the pool of waiting families? There were so many choices we made along the way that guided us toward the moment Jack entered our lives.

And we simply can’t overlook the role of chance — the serendipitous forces that conspired so that Jack’s birth mother chose us.

What do we mean?

If not for Elizabeth one day finding an Iowa Hawkeyes baseball cap in a restaurant and choosing to keep it…if not for a day fishing with her dad when she chose to wear that cap…if not for the fish she caught which led to her dad taking a photo of her wearing that cap…if not for that photo being chosen from hundreds to appear in our adoption book…if not for Jack’s birth mother having a special connection to Iowa, seeing that photo of Elizabeth in that cap, then deciding we were worth meeting…we might not be anticipating Jack’s 18-month milestone.

Adoption has been an incredible experience for our family, though we will be the first to acknowledge beginner’s luck. Our first adoption process was quick, smooth and without a hint of heartbreak. We're reminded of how blessed we were every morning when we see Jack's smiling face. 

Today, we are choosing to grow our family by pursuing our second adoption, and just like last time, we are using this website to share our story in hopes you might share it with someone you know who is making an adoption plan. 

An own source adoption process actually looks a lot like an adoption through a private agency. Adoptive parents still submit an application to an agency, submit to a background check, participate in a home study and attend several educational sessions. Furthermore, the agency chosen to facilitate the adoption also provides ongoing counseling to the birth parents post-placement. The biggest difference is we would not be among 15-30 families an agency would present as options to an expectant mother who approached them seeking a to make a plan.

Whether its family, friends, neighbors, fellow parents, parishioners or co-workers, chances are your personal network is vast. It is not rare to know someone (directly or through someone else) who is navigating an unexpected pregnancy and who is seeking an adoption plan.

That is where we ask that you think of us. We can be a part of their plan. And connecting us can truly be as simple as sharing our website address and letting chance intervene. You don’t even need to let us know you shared our info.

We are in the very beginning stages of our second adoption and couldn't be more excited to make Jack a big brother. We hope you will follow us. And who knows? Maybe you’ll be able to help us, too.